Do you ever meet people that just really get under your skin? Like to the point where if they even breathe around you it drives you crazy???
Yeah, me neither.
Ok, so that's not true. Some people bug me. I don't instantly L.O.V. E. every single person I meet. But honestly, I get pretty darn close. I like most people. Even if you don't make a good first impression, I always give people the benefit of the doubt. And 9 times out of 10, I can find the "good" in them. I can look past why I was turned off about their personality at first, and see that I just needed to get to know them better to really get them. Most people are cool.
But sometimes, even the girl who likes everybody has to dislike someone.
It takes A LOT for you to get on my shit list. You have to consistently stomp all over my "benefit of the doubt" theory to make up my mind that you suck. And it just doesn't happen very often. Because I would also like to think of myself as a nice person. Not fake nice, just genuine. Cordial. Friendly. We don't have to be BFFs, but I'm going to treat you with the respect that you deserve as a fellow human being. Therefore, I'm not used to people being not nice to me. Makes sense right? Treat others as you would want to be treated?
So I guess I just don't understand why people seemingly go out of their way to make other people feel bad about themselves. Sure, they may passive-aggressively disguise their comments and actions, but the intent is the same.
"Oh, you climbed a mountain??? That's cute. I climbed five. Yeah I must be stronger than you or something."
Can someone please explain to me how you can get pleasure out of putting someone down? I am just not hard-wired to be that way. I'll admit, sometimes I wish I was. Whenever I'm faced with a comment like the one above, I always think of something witty and nasty to retort back, but I can't say it. I want to, but I can't. I'm no Regina George - I can't say something knowingly hurtful or condescending. I just.can't.do.it. Part of it is that I have always tried to "kill em with kindness." The other part is that it's just not in my nature. I imagine that something condescending coming out of my mouth would look like liquid hot tar (metaphorically speaking), and it would probably sound awkward because I'd be so uncomfortable.
Now, I know that at some point in my life, I've offended people. But I can't remember ever being intentionally hurtful or condescending, and that's the point. You know they know what they're saying or doing, but they do it anyway.
So I have two options: Engage or disengage. Play into it and hope it gets better, or avoid avoid avoid. Neither seems like a great option. Why can't they just be better??? That would solve all the problems :)
This post had no point really. Just venting. Because at the end of the day, I take a look at my life, and realize that someone's hurtful comments really don't affect me. No asinine jabs can take away the fact that I have the closest thing to a "perfect" marriage I can imagine, a beautiful daughter, and a house full of love and affection. You can't take that away from me, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. But sometimes I just wanna go:
Ya feel me?
I have a sharp tongue sometimes but you're that at the end of the day you never feel good about saying those comments!
ReplyDeleteI feel you! While I have, when it just comes out, said some not nice things to these people because you can only take so much, most times you just ignore them. They clearly are unhappy with themselves and their life and jealous of what you have.
ReplyDeleteGirl I feel you on everything here! Sometimes I try to give people the benefit of the doubt because I really hate to assume people go through their day to one up me. I even try to think "maybe they don't notice", but alas it is on going and I really just want to punch anyone like that so so so so so so so FRUSTRATING!!!!!!! People suck {sometimes}.
ReplyDeleteyeah girl. I'm totally that 'nice girl' too and it sucks when other people take so much pride in being so hurtful. These people are jealous. They are unhappy in their own life and project that onto you and everyone around them. Somehow these people always show up at work. That one place where you have to be... you get paid to be... and for whatever reason these hateful b*tches are hired there too.
ReplyDeleteI believe that life is full of lessons. That you have to learn how to handle situations or they will keep on repeating themself in your life. But once you figure out how to handle and move on from the situation you will be free of it.
Sorry you have such a mean girl in your life. Sometimes the ignoring plan works. Sometimes the confrontation. You'll know what to do next time you have to be around her. And hopefully she'll take the hint.