Tuesday, April 30, 2013

It's Gonna Be May

Tomorrow is May 1st.

May 2013 will probably go down as one of the busiest months of our lives. Here is why:

May 1: Doctor's appointment.

May 3: Last day of work until August!!!

May 7: Move all of our crap out of our current house into a moving van. All of it. Thank God we found movers who are cheap and willing to come two days in a row. Clean said house. Park said moving van in sister's driveway for the night. Also have my 40 week appointment this day, because we're not busy or anything.

May 8: Close on our first house. Close on our second house. Give away keys to one house. Get keys to another house. If it sounds confusing, that's because it is. Drive aforementioned moving truck over to our new house and unload. Begin painting. Why yes, I did purchase 14 gallons of paint this weekend. Why, what did you do?

May 9: Our 4-year wedding anniversary. Reminisce with me will ya?

May 10: My 29th birthday. Also known as the last time I will ever publicly acknowledge my age.

May 11: This is the ambitious day when I'd like to believe that all of the painting is done in our new house. After living in various states of construction for 4 years, I am so so so happy that the only thing our new place really needs is paint (14 gallons to be exact). Still, Rome wasn't built in a day, so I'm sure it will take more than 3 days to paint the whole place, despite how many helpers we may or may not have. However, I like to goal set so here we are.

May 12: D-DAY. Also known as Due Date. Also known as Mother's Day. This would be an okay day to go into labor, don't you think?

May 18: My good friend Heather's wedding. I've already RSVP'd yes, and it's annoying when people RSVP and you pay for their meal and they don't show up for your wedding, so bloated or not, I'm going to be there. I should probably start Googling "Dresses to hide post-pregnancy weight" now.

May 2_- 2_: He's told me 100 times, but Jon has some kind of work conference thing one of the last weeks in May. All I heard was "You're going to be alone with two children for the first time ever" and I decided to block it from my memory due to terror.

May 31: Memorial Day weekend begins. I'll be able to wear a bathing suit again by this time right?? And by bathing suit I mean Turkish bath robe.

Alright May - let's do this!!!!

Monday, April 29, 2013

A letter to my youngest

Dear tiny sweetheart in my belly,

As I prepare for my last week of work, I am in awe of time. The way that time seems to fly during the most important moments in your life. Because honestly, I could swear it was yesterday that I took a pregnancy test on a whim and then BAM! I realized I would no longer have a child, but children.

You, my dear, are destined to be the most patient, laid back baby imaginable for how cool you've been with what's happening on the outside. From your big sister crawling directly on my belly, to my admitted lack of "rest" over the last 38 weeks, to the obscene amount of ice cream I've eaten over the last month. You've been awesome. Always with perfect reports from the doctor. Always giving me a little nudge here or there when I need them, but then taking nice long rests at night so mommy can sleep.

I'll admit that I feel all kinds of guilt that moms feel when pregnant with a toddler in tow. Dubbed "second baby syndrome," you are so busy with your active little one at home that you can't embrace pregnancy the way that you did the first time (or the second time in my case). But as I've promised you many, many times, once you're here little one... no one will love you more than your mom and dad.

Some people worry that you won't bond with your second the way you did with your first, but that's actually the least of my worries (and I have alot of them). I just know that nothing compares to the love you feel for your child, and since I know how that feels with your sister and your angel brother, I know that the way I will feel about you will be no different.

No, I mostly worry about dedicating the perfect amount of time to both of my girls. I don't want either of you to ever feel left out or less important than your sibling. I don't want either of you to think I have a "favorite" child - this would kill me. I want you to know that you are both automatically my favorites, because asking me to choose between you two is like asking me to choose whether I'd like to breathe or like for my heart to beat - both are completely essential and you can't have one without the other. (Well, I suppose you can artificially, but let's just work with this metaphor, shall we?)

My point is... your birth order makes no difference to me. You are special. You are loved. You are wanted. You are important, and I could not be more grateful to have you. I get goosebumps and my eyes well up with tears thinking about the moment when I'll first get to see your face, hold you in my arms, and study your features until I have them memorized. I can already picture rocking you to sleep (in our new house!) and smelling that sweet new baby smell and realizing that even though life isn't perfect, we have everything we need because we have you and we have love.

Can't wait to meet you little one!!!



Friday, April 26, 2013

Friday's Letters

Dear Friday: I love you. Amen.

Dear work: I love you (most of the time) but I'm only giving you one more week, and then I'm off for 12 weeks!

Dear contractions: Please stop. This baby cannot come even one day before her due date. I think I'm the only mom-to-be that has ever wished for her child to be overdue

Dear sweet angel in my belly: Despite what I said above, I cannot wait to meet you. You've been really taking it easy on me the last few weeks, and I can't tell you how much I appreciate that.The idea that I'm going to see your sweet face in just a few short days brings me to tears every time I think about it.

Dear May (the month): You are going to be crazy/fun/busy/exciting. Let's do this.

Dear new house: I dream about you every night. I hope you like me as much as I like you.

Dear Breyer's: Please discontinue your line of Oreo Blast ice cream. It would really help my addiction if I knew you didn't existed. Follow in the path of Twinkies. 

Dear apathetic paint counter worker at Lowe's: Get ready, son. A crazy pregnant lady is about to come in and color match a good 10 gallons of paint. You won't even know what hit you.

Dear Emerson: Why are you so adorable all the time?

Thursday, April 25, 2013

The first and last time I ever cut my daughter's hair

Oh, me. 

So hear me out. 

My darling girl was getting a mullet again. You remember her mullet from a few months ago? Well, it looked like this, but was worse. 

Just kidding. More like this:

Her bangs were in her face, and her hair was so long in the back. I just couldn't let her go on having hair in her eyes and have a mullet. I make fun of mullets. I can't make fun of Emerson.

Adorable, yes. But we constantly had to push her bangs to the side so she could see. Not good.
So I said to myself: "Self, instead of taking her to Cookie Cutters, you can just give her a quick trim after her bath tonight. You're good with scissors."


I did SUCH a bad job. It looks like a blind man with a butcher knife cut this poor child's hair. These pictures do not do it justice. Check out the uneven-ness in the back, and the super super short bangs in the front. Ugh. I'm so ashamed.

And, in fine parenting fashion, Jon and I could not stop laughing at how bad it looked. (Please forgive me baby girl, if you're reading this someday. I'm not perfect, but you know that by now).

I took her the next day to get her hair fixed so that she no longer looked like an Amish boy. 

It's super short now (the stylist literally had to take an electric razor to the back of her head, that's how bad it was) but I am telling people that it's a light and fresh haircut for summer. 

And that is how I sleep at night.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Full-term Update!

I will officially be full-term on Sunday. 


I feel like just yesterday I was dry-heaving into the toilet and gagging over the smell of Indian food. 

But now reality has set in, and I am just in awe.

My BFF said it best in an email from yesterday. 

"Do you realize that in a month from now, your life is going to be vastly different?"

 And she's right. New house. New baby. I'm going to have CHILDREN. Not just a baby, but a toddler and a baby. And I'm going to bring these children home to a new house in a new city. You'd think I'd be panicked, but I'm not. I'm actually really excited. (Okay, maybe a little panicked, but still). It's chaotic, it's crazy, and I honestly can't complain. Things are going to be crazy and complicated at first, no doubt, but the day I complain about having two healthy children, a loving husband, 12 weeks off in the summer to spend with my new baby, and a brand new house is the day you can bitch-slap me and tell me to shape up. 

So before life gets really crazy, here's my full-term pregnancy update:

How far along? 36 weeks, 5 days 

Maternity clothes? Now that the weather has been a little warmer, my uniform is a maternity dress, or maternity pants with a longer shirt and a cardigan. I will be honest, I miss regular clothes.

Stretch marks? I thought I was home free, but alas, there are two under my belly that appeared sometime in the last 2 weeks. I named them Norman and Herman, because they are lame.
Symptoms: Generally feel pretty good. Starting to get really tired, but that's to be expected when you look like you're smuggling a basketball under your shirt. At this point with Em I had terrible back pain and had to wear a belly brace, but I feel basically normal until I look at myself from the side and then go "Whoa! Who is that whale in the mirror?!?!" 

Sleep: Pretty good. I feel pretty energized in the morning, but I get really tired around 3 PM everyday, and then get my second wind when I get home and get to play with Emerson. It's like I have a separate energy pocket reserved just for her.

Best moments this week: Celebrating our baby girl at my sprinkle; getting to see her sweet face on the ultrasound and finding out she weighs almost 7lbs!

  Miss Anything? Not having to pee in the middle of the night.
Movement: Girlfriend is just so busy in there! She moves constantly, and loves sticking her butt (or back?) on to my right side. 

Food cravings: Oreo ice cream (when it doesn't give me acid reflux)

Anything making you queasy or sick: Not really. I am so ready to have coffee again though it's not even funny.

Have you started to show yet: Haha. You're funny.

Wedding Rings On or Off?: Still on! I can't believe it. By 30 weeks last time, I could only wear my wedding band. I can still wear both rings comfortably, so I must not be quite as bloated as I was back then. 

Have a lovely weekend! :)

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Random Wednesday

* I took a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and had to take a picture. I used to be able to tuck this shirt in, and now my stomach is so large, the horizontal stripes on this shirt are crooked. But I refuse to buy any more maternity clothing because I only have 25 days to go (AHHH).

* We had an ultrasound yesterday, which was awesome! We've got a cutie patootie in there :) Baby girl #2 measured in at a healthy 6lbs 9oz, and doesn't seem to be showing any signs of coming as early as her sister did. This is great news.

* I have only packed 2 boxes, and we move in 20 days. One box is full of washed baby clothes (that was so much fun to get to see those tiny things again!) and the other are the decorative books from our bookcase. Random, but productive.

* The name we picked for the baby has been scrapped. We're now back to the drawing board. Indecisiveness is neat.

* I dream about paint color almost every single night.

* I also had a dream my mom won $3.5 million in the lottery. Mom, I think you should go buy a ticket, just in case I'm a psychoic.

* My BFF and I have decided that everyone needs to know the following 5 people: a doctor, a lawyer, an electrician, a plumber and a mechanic. Anyone else is just a bonus.

* For the past 5 days in a row, I have had to make the difficult decision between eating ice cream and facing the wrath of heartburn, or not eating ice cream. I'm 5 for 5.

* I'm worried that my current library will realize we're moving to a new city and will cut off my free Kindle downloads. Please don't tell on me.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Monday, April 15, 2013

I ate three sundaes on a Sunday

What a wonderful weekend! I'm about to spew all kinds of happy things, hope you don't mind.

Here's why it was awesome:

1) This girl. Obviously. Easter Basket #2 + Bed Head = Love. 

2) Our new house passed it's inspection, meaning I'm 99% sure we're moving on May 8th! 

3) I found movers that only charge $60/hour and I am certain it will be the greatest investment in the history of investments.

4) Sunday's weather was phenomenal and made me remember why spring is the greatest season of the year (in Ohio at least)

5) I got to spend time with lots of amazing people

6) I had a $3 bar tab (after getting a beer spilled on me and unknowingly ordering a cayenne-spiced brownie, the waiter felt bad and only made me pay for my french fries)

7) I proved that you CAN be 36 weeks pregnant and still go out to the bar for your friends birthday, as long as they serve water and french fries.

8) I went to a "Scentsy" party that actually turned into a Baby Shower for our new princess. I am so touched and grateful and words can't express how much I love my friends. How people can be so thoughtful all the time is beyond me, but these gals prove the world isn't so bad. They also bought gifts for me and for Emerson, including this book that I tried reading to her last night and only got through 3 pages without crying. 

9) I ate three ice cream sundaes and that's just fine.  

10) I have the most wonderful friends and family EVER.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Audra's Version of Property Brothers - Part 1

Let's do some math!!!

What do you get when you combine:

A lifechanging, major purchase


Pregnancy Insomnia


A person who watches WAY too much HGTV


A pregnant woman who has come up with a comprehensive design scheme for a house that she doesn't even own full and clear yet.

Ok, so let's just say that, hypothetically, we bought this house: 

Well, non-hypothetically, I have spent hours upon hours coming up with a design scheme for this hypothetical house that has beautiful bones but an outdated color palette.

This is where Jonathan and Drew come in. No, I'm not having an affair. J & D are the hosts of Property Brothers on HGTV, and they have been my inspiration for our hypothetical new home design. 

If you haven't seen the show (seriously, what's wrong with you), the premise is that a couple is looking for a home that is contemporary and move-in ready, but they don't have the budget to accomplish both of those goals. So Drew finds them a house with potential, and Jonathan helps them renovate, re-imagine, and resign their fixer-upper into their dream home. He shows them his design plan, but also leaves it open to change.

Our hypothetical house is definitely NOT a fixer-upper (trust, I've been there) but it's just... beige. Boring. And we're not boring people. (At least I don't think so?)

So in all of my insomnia, I have re-imagined and re-designed every square inch of our beautiful new hypothetical home. Now it's just up to MY Jonathan (my actual husband) to renovate it. I probably shouldn't be installing carpet and painting at 9 months pregnant, hmmm?

So I thought I'd share some of my design ideas because they are burning a hole through my laptop and Pinterest boards.

And here we go:

Hypothetical entry way as it looks today:

Design Ideas:

The main color of the house will be Revere Pewter gray, and we plan to paint all of the wood trim white. We're also replacing all of the carpet, because it's beige with dark brown and black flecks and reminds me of vomit.

Formal Living Room Today:

Design Ideas:

As of today (and I have every right to change my mind because I'm a woman and I can and will), I'd like to do a dark gray accent wall, with white adjoining walls. Then I'd like to bring in pops of yellow as accents. I'm leaning toward either white or dark grey furniture in here (or both). Not pictured: A gorgeous built-in bookshelf that is to the left of where the picture was taken. May either paint that white or black.

Instead of a TV, I'd like to do a black and white photo wall as the focal point in the room. Probably with pictures of my sweet girls as the main subject of interest :)

I think these curtains from Z Gallerie are PERFECT for a room with a dark gray accent wall and white walls. They let in a good amount of light, but it brings the gray over to the other wall.

Dining Room Today:

 Design Ideas:

The theme I'm thinking for this room is Sage, Beige and Black. I want a gray/green since again the main color of the home is gray, so the colors have to coordinate. Right now I'm leaning toward a color called October Mist.

This room is the closest to my vision, but I think we'll paint under the chair rail white because there's only the one small window in this room and I don't want it to feel too dark.

So what do we think of my hypothetical stabs at home design??? Would Jonathan and Drew be proud or ashamed???

Monday, April 8, 2013

Emerson 15 Month Update

Let's talk about this girl.... 

Weight: ~20-21lbs. Skinny arms and legs with a big belly :)

Word Count: 65! She is actually starting to freak us out with how many words she knows. Obviously mommy's degree in Communication has been passed down a generation. She is SO good at communicating what she thinks/wants/needs, and is starting to pull more and more "sentences" together, i.e. "More. Milk. Please?" "Mommy. Bath. Quack quack. Water." It's like she takes stock of her surroundings and gives you all the words she knows that relate to it.

My favorite new words of hers are Computer (comes out as Poo-ter), Puppy (every single time she hears a puppy barking she screams "PUPPY!!), Car and Okay. (LOVE this one - "Emerson, want to come with mommy?" "Okaaaaay").

Hair: Well, the mullet is back. It's growing too fast now to do anything about it, though she'll need a bang trim here pretty soon.

Sleep: Sigh. I am going to miss these nights when we lay our baby down and she doesn't wake up for 12 hours. I know your baby sister will not let that happen for quite some time. The cutest thing ever is that she has now started requesting her naps. "Baby? Night-night. Happy" means "Go get my baby doll, I am ready for a nap please, once you sing my happy song that is."

Favorite Toy: Books. This is a girl after my own heart. I was SUCH a book nerd as a kiddo. When she goes into her bedroom, she immediately goes for her bookshelf and pulls down 3-4 books to "read" to herself. I took her to the play area of the library the other day, and she was bored of the toys after a few minutes, and then wandered around till she found books for us to read together :)

She also loves sweeping the floors. Please don't call CPS on me. She's not very good at it. 

That face. I die.
Favorite Foods:  Strawberries. Waffles. Blueberries. Peanut butter. Can't. get. enough. PB. "Mommy! Up! Butter!" is an after-nap chant I hear regularly.

Favorite New Action: She now reaches for our hands and guides us places. She loves exploring, and now that it's warm out, she just loves walking around the neighborhood. I think she'll like her new neighborhood even more ;-)

Big sister potential: Lucky for us (maybe unlucky for her?) your lovely babysitter has a new baby at home, so she is sort of laying the groundwork for us (thank you Skye!) with the idea of having a new baby sister in the house. It was confusing for Em at first, when she'd say "Up!" and Skye couldn't pick her up because she was holding the baby, but she is getting the hang of it and is proving just how adaptable and resilient she is. 

Let's throw in a new sister AND a new house in the same week and see how she handles it, hmmm? Pray for me.

Friday, April 5, 2013

The 7-Year Scratch and a Non-Announcement

Today is 4-5-13.

On this day 7 years ago, 4-5-06, Jon and I had our first date. 

We went to the Winking Lizard and joined the World Tour of Beers. Because nothing says true love like sharing a lager with your crush.

We consider that our first "date," but, when you're friends with someone for 4 years before you start dating them, it's kinda like "Hey, let's hang out like normal, only now we might kiss at the end of the night."

The oldest recorded picture of us on Facebook and therefore readily available to post. May 2007 I think?

Seven years. This is supposedly the time when couples develop the "7 Year Itch" aka they are growing tired of each other, I guess. I just know it as a Marilyn Monroe flick. This also means that we have lived together for 7 years. (Stop judging me - we were roommates while we were still friends, and then we started dating and it seemed silly to live apart at that point.)

Now I'm not saying that we are a perfect couple or having a perfect marriage. But after 7 years, I love him exponentially more than I ever thought I could. 

2007/8 - I think?

Maybe it's the fact that we've been through the worst experience imaginable together. Maybe it's because we have the world's most wonderful daughter, and another on the way. Maybe it's because he makes me laugh like no one can.

Whatever it is, I can honestly say I don't feel the "itch." Metaphorically, I feel like we've only "scratched" the surface our relationship. Meaning, holy cow that was a quick 7 years! I still feel like we're learning about each other. 

We have so much going on in our lives right now, maybe we'll experience a 9 year itch. I'm sure we are not immune to hard times in our marriage.

But for now, dare I say I actually still like this fella?

Engagement Night

As for my non-announcement, it's Non because I don't want to say it out loud until it's all said and done.

But let's just say, hypothetically, that maybe we sold our house. And, hypothetically, maybe bought another one. 

Hypothetically of course. 

Stay tuned.

Monday, April 1, 2013

A toddler ate my baby

How else can one possibly explain this discrepancy??? 

Easter 2012 seems like it was last month. Our little baby has grown so much in one year. Sniff sniff.

She didn't quite grasp the concept of the egg "hunt." She found her first two eggs, and then just held onto them and wandered around. She also loved carrying her baskets (which when she says the word, comes out more like "baguette." Is she taking French lessons at day care???)