Letter to my daughter... by me

My sweet baby girl...

Today is December 1st, and sometime this month, I will be holding you in my arms. I hope you don't feel overwhelmed by all of the love that is about to spill forth in this letter. Hopefully some day you can understand for yourself.

You are the sweetest little miracle I could ever imagine. Though we haven't "met" yet (on the outside anyway) I feel like I know you better than anyone. And that's probably because I do.

For example, I know you are kind and considerate. You've given mommy the easiest pregnancy I could imagine. Sure I was nauseous in the beginning, and sure I may get uncomfortable some times, but one tiny little nudge from you and I realize how minor these discomforts are compared to the life you have ahead of you... a life that I get to witness, nurture, and in which I will play a critical role.

You are playful and fun-spirited. I love watching you move from one side of my belly to the other, and watching you react to my singing voice (You either love it or hate it, but either way you let me know you can hear me).

You are adventurous. You can eat lemons one minute and crave milk the next. I hope this translates to a hunger for life and spontaneity that surpasses what your daddy and me can show you (and believe me, we want to show you ALOT). I hope you always appreciate any opportunity in which you can learn more, see more, do more.

All these things I know about you already, sweet girl. I know this because you receive more of my attention than anyone else. I know this because I know your daddy so well, and you are SO truly blessed to be half of him; you will learn over and over again that he is one of the best ones. And I know this because we have wished, prayed, and hoped for you, our beautiful miracle, for so long. You will never fully understand how loved you are, but let's just say that if love could move a mountain... the Grand Canyon would be in our backyard.

There are so many things I wish for you baby girl... mistakes I've made that I never want you to make; experiences I've had that I want you to have; experiences I've had that I want you to avoid. I wish I could protect you from every person, place, and thing that will every cause you any type of harm, pain, or sadness. While you're here in my belly, I can keep you safe... but once you're on the outside, I feel like I will be able to protect you less and less with each passing day.

But without those experiences, mistakes, regrets... I wouldn't be me. And daddy wouldn't be daddy. And therefore, you wouldn't be you. Sometimes I think about the path that our lives have taken... what if I had made one different decision? Every single thing that has happened to me and to daddy has led to this... has led to you. So even though I know I can't protect you forever, I know that you have a lifetime of joy and happiness in front of you.

I am equal parts excited/scared/nervous/anxious/elated and everything in between. I just want to meet you so badly, but I know that day is coming so so soon. I am going to miss rubbing my belly, and watching you squirm all around in there. Even when I'm by myself, you're always there... but not for long. I'm going to have to share you with the world, and even though I'll miss carrying you, I'm even more excited to watch you grow.

I love you princess... see you soon.

~ Momma